Twenty Years

Furrowing her brow, Brit peeked again at Ethan. She could see into the hallway where the light was starting to fade from the windows beyond. Briefly she mused that he had not felt sunshine in so very long, and would never feel it again. The room had been set up so that the reflected sunlight could be glimpsed in the attached room, but the wall did not allow it to even accidently reflect to where they rested. The wall was a small marvel of engineering for which Ethan had paid dearly so that Brit could maintain her sense of day and night. Images of the night before flashed in her memory. She focused on each one as she pulled the threads of her gown that were torn and loose trying to remember at which point her dress was damaged.

True to Ethan’s word, Brit had not left the room where they rested. Requested pancakes had been delivered and he politely turned down her request to play a game of chase. At no point did Ethan leave the room either, and he spoke only when necessary. Unlike before when they spent weeks in their resting place, there were no stories or cuddles or anything. Brit had spent hours layering color after color over the same single line. Ethan sat at his desk pretending to go over some ledgers but was keenly aware of her. Thinking she might catch his eye, Brit looked up at him from her coloring book. He was not watching her. “Vexed,” he had said when she asked whether he was angry. Closing the book with a sigh, she walked to where six marbles remained next to a wall. Settling near them, she rolled them one at a time watching them slowly move to the other side of the room and come to a complete stop before rolling the next one. Once all six were clustered, she moved to the other side of the room to repeat the process. She did not notice Ethan’s fingers squeeze the ledger slightly at the inevitable soft tap as the marble hit the wall.

Closing the ledger, Ethan moved to the chest with his belongings and dressed as he had been the night before. He combed his hair back into the usual style and arranged himself to perfection. Returning to his chair, he watched her roll the marbles again across the floor in silence keeping her self busy. Hearing the sixth marble tap the wall, he rolled it directly back to her. “Brit,” he started softly, “I want you to explain to me what you did wrong. Try to go into as much detail as you can.”

Brit caught the marble and picked it up along with the other marbles to place them in a bag. “I made you mad…vexed…. because I left the Shelter when you said not to.” Picking up her few crayons near the book, she started to arrange them in a box according to the color wheel. Ethan watched her and noticed that her gown was scrunched about her making it look as if she were sitting in a puddle of damask fabric. She said nothing else but her thoughts added, “And that is why you don’t love me anymore.”

Tilting his head to the side in surprise, he moved a bit closer touching her chin with his index and middle fingers to lift it up until she looked to him. “Of course I love you. That is why I’m very particular about your understanding this cannot ever happen again.” The realization that his wife thought he no longer loved her caused an unsettling feeling that left him to babble slightly, “You will always do as I tell you. Because you know I am more experienced and will always care for you…acting in our best interest.” Ethan stopped for a moment to give Brit a chance to process before continuing, “When I go to great length to educate you about something, you will not ignore me…or let curiosity have you act against my requests. We had discussed this very issue just the day before intensely and you disobeyed me the very next day.” Looking down, he saw her take his hand and paused, and then added quickly, “You promised to obey when we got married.” She did not respond and he could see she was lost in thought. He whispered, “But of course I love you, Brit.”

“But you did not give me kisses. Not when I saw you or even when we rested,” she replied. Her fingers traced the shape of his hand. “Not when I saw you or even when we rested.” Her voice was not accusatory but seemed bewildered.

Ethan nodded in agreement. “That is true. You see, actions yield consequences and, depending on the actions, there are positive or negative ones.” He continued for sometime justifying reasoning for the lack of kisses. Her fingers trailed over his hand. Sometimes, the tracing took on the shape of patterns. Letters…numbers. Ethan did not notice as he continued, “If I did not care about you the way that I do, I would not really think about it and would have ignored such a situation.” She seemed focused on the tracing of his hand. Letters and numbers and symbols. Watching her, Ethan was saying, “Me being so affected by you though doesn’t allow me to act differently.” Brit seemed silently focused on his hand as she continued to trace. “I need to know you understand what you did wrong and not ever do it again.”

Even after he had finished speaking, she continued to focus on the numbers which she now wrote on his palm with her finger. He could see she was heavily focused and so he looked to her mind. She was counting. In her mind, she was adding, multiplying, dividing, and multiplying again. “Twenty years, Ethan.” The number twenty was clearly seen in her mind.

Tilting his head to the side, he kept one hand touching her chin and supported the weight of her head so that he could look directly at her. “What do you mean twenty years, Brit? Perhaps you will enlighten me as I do not see this correlation at this moment as what this has to do with making me feel you understand what the issue was and is, and what you need to change.” Setting his jaw, he grumbled, “I do not understand ‘twenty years’.”

Brit continued to draw a set of numbers on his palm silently. He could see she was deeply saddened over the realization that she had broken a promise to him and had broken her promise to God. “Twenty years, Ethan.” Looking up, she whispered, “It is how long you have made me wait for a kiss now, if I compare your years to mine.”

Ethan blinked once at her thought process and tried to do the math to see how accurate she was. Halfway through, he realized that she had just distracted him, though not on purpose. That would not do when he was annoyed that she allowed a distraction to take her from the Shelter. Ethan shook his head and refocused on her. “I waited hundreds of years for you to give me that first kiss; and I shall not have it spoiled by things we can change and affect with our behavior.” His mouth set firmly. “You will understand fully what you did wrong and be sure not to ever repeat the same mistake!” Realizing his voice was too forceful and too fast, he regrouped and said more calmly as he released her chin and adjusted the lace on his sleeve. “After that, you can have all the kisses that you crave.” Hinting a pout, he grumbled, “It hurts me as much as you not to share such things. But I need to know you understand first.”

Remaining close, she peeked up at him beneath her sooty lashes and her fingers caressed his wrist. “Are you going to make me wait twenty-one years for a kiss?” Ethan peeked in her mind at her thoughts. Her question lacked the manipulative motives another might seek: Brit simply wanted her kisses and he saw she was feeling rejection. His fingers stretched toward her face that seemed to shimmer in the low light with the porcelain perfection that it had attained via his vitae’s powers. Her motions were gracefully feminine and her eyes remained guileless. His mood grew dark at the unfairness of such a combination.

Pulling his wrist back, he focused again on his lace sleeve and said quickly, “It is not like I woke and suddenly denied you kisses.” His words were sounding stale to him. He tilted his head to the side and gazed at her a moment. Her lips had formed a perfect pout and she rested her hand on his shoulder touching his hair. Ethan blinked feeling himself wanting the soft touches. He straightened remembering what he was telling her. “Maybe I forgot I want to kiss you like you forgot what I told you explicitly not to do?” The words sounded wrong to him. Her lower lip quivered and he stammered, “No. I did not forget.” Her eyes seemed greener than he ever remembered as she watched him. Clearing his throat, he tried to remember where he was, “Because…I know the importance of such things.” Her fingers lightly caressed his upper arms. He noticed the whiteness of her fingers against his dark jacket. His words whispered rather slowly, “It’s a fact that…depending on your behavior…I will be seeking them more or less than usual.” Ethan blinked feeling her hand touch his hair again. He started to reach for her hand but ended up wrapping an arm around her. His voice grew softer. “Brit. I just..I need to know that you understand and will not repeat the same mistake.” His arms tightened slowly closing the gap between them. His lips barely touched her forehead in the softest of kisses.

Brit closed her eyes and held her breath through his kiss. She could feel her skin tingle beneath where he had touched. “I do not mean to upset you, Ethan…or hurt you.” Her body pressed against his and he could smell the sunshine on her skin. “I just do not think that kisses should be given for anything but love.” Silence followed for moments. Her body dragged across his as she stood on her tiptoes to press her lips lightly to his, as gentle as an angel’s wing. Ethan pulled her in tighter. The kiss reminded him of the slow, soft kiss she gave him in return to the first kiss he had ever given her.

Her body was warm and soft as she nuzzled against him. Ethan could sense her sincerity. His lips gave her another soft kiss. “No, you did not do it on purpose….perhaps this is what leaves me not pleased…” Brit returned each of his kisses silently and she seemed relieved to see that he still loved her. “You will think of things before you…” His words were interrupted by another returned kiss. “You will give consideration and priorities to your actions.” More kisses that deepened and lingered. “I…know you are not a little girl…you will not think like a little girl again.” His fingers entwined in her hair and his words were lost in his observation of its softness. “And you will always do what I go to great lengths to make sure is done.”

Pressing against him, she returns each kiss. “Okay,” she whispers wrapping her arms around his neck kissing him with a sweet softness that melts into a kiss that begs to be deepened. Ethan kept her close to him. His fingers never leaving their position as she takes more initiative. Nodding once, he felt she finally understood him. Her heart called to him. Again, he focused on the sound of her blood flowing in her body and the warmth of her lips against his skin. His other arm wrapped around her pulling her tightly to him, perhaps too tightly. Ethan lifted Brit up walking a few meters to his desk where he pressed her against it with his body weight. He paused a moment to ensure he had said all he wanted to say.

Ethan felt annoyed with himself that Brit could prove such a distraction. Placing a finger to her lips, he said menacingly, “You will not disobey me again.” His eyes widened as she opened her lips to bite his finger gently. Her mind was open and he heard clearly a ‘yes, Ethan’. He could feel all of her sadness being replaced by love. There was no fear in his menacing demeanor. “All women have the make up to be Jezebels,” he muttered. Not making any excuses about pinning her arms, he opened his mouth wide and plunged his fangs deep into her neck. Biting quite hard, he took slow but deep sips of her, much like a beast would take of its prey. The sips grew more paced. Keeping her pinned with one hand, he bit into his own wrist pressing the pooling blood to her lips. Ethan flexed his wrist causing the blood to flow into her more like a demanded sharing of him rather than an offering. He continued to drink of her as she did of him. His body kept her pinned along with his fangs in her throat. His vitae continued to pour into her as his free hand sifted through the multiple layers of her gown until he touched her bare skin.

Hours passed. Ethan had not felt dizzy from blood exchange, but he felt dizzy tonight. The slow exchange of blood for kisses and kisses for blood gave both heady sensations. Ethan noticed that Brit’s sweat had a pink tinge to it. After ensuring all puncture wounds were safely closed, he listened to her thread heartbeat and examined the deep bruises on her body. Sitting up, he blinked at the slight head rush and brushed his hair back. Looking down at her on the desk, he touched his lips wiping blood from them. “We won’t be going out tonight,” he whispered and carried her to cuddle until sunrise.