Ethan took Brit to the rooftop to get fresh air. Together they watched people come and go along the street below. The night air had grown crisp hinting at cold weather, but Ethan felt at peace enjoying the unusual tranquility of the city. With Brit snuggled in his embrace, he felt all was right with the world and then he heard it. The shrill remark from a woman in the shadows of the alley across the street, “You bloody bastard! I should kick your ass for cheating on me with that sow!” Ethan’s arms tensed and he glowered in the direction of the shout.“The lady does not sound happy,” lisped Brit. Her head turned up toward his face as she commented. He smiled tersely down to her and stroked her cheek. “It sounds like the pig girl maybe found a beloved?”
The second part caused Ethan to grin. “I do believe that the woman is cross with the one she calls her beloved.” More comments from the woman followed, all were peppered with expletives. Brit blinked and Ethan growled low, “And, do not mistake this, Brit. That is no lady.”
With a tilt of her head, she said, “Do you know the lady…er…um….lady, or are you guessing she is not a real Lady?” Nibbling her lower lip, she asked, “You sometimes say that ladies are not Ladies. How can you tell?” It was one of life’s greater mysteries about her husband.
Brit’s question caused Ethan’s dark mood lift as fast as it descended. His arms tightened around her and he pulled her back playfully giving her a loving smooch on the cheek. He began to explain, “See, Brit, vulgar people use vulgar words. Take that ‘lady’, for example. She called him a ‘bloody bastard’, did she not?” Brit nodded and Ethan hinted a grin at her attentiveness. “Indeed, she did. I used to hear that word often from vulgar people. ‘Bloody bad work. The bloody bad day.’ It seemed that they knew what a bloody day or week was; but a virtuous woman should not know what a ‘bloody’ thing is.”
Ethan turned Brit to him and walked her to the wall that outlined the rooftop. Sitting on the small walled perimeter, he turned her so he could pull her down on his lap. Stroking her arm, he continued, “Moreover, a virtuous woman is delicate and should not want to know anything about such examples; for they would be disgusted or appalled should someone mindlessly slaughter a lamb or a bird in front of them.” Ethan’s voice trailed off a bit as he added softly, “At least….that is how it use to be. And the world was better for it, I believe.”
Brit seemed troubled. Nibbling on her lower lip, she processed his words as he stroked her cheek. 'Virtuous' seemed to be what he wished her to be. There was a problem and so she whispered, “I know what blood is, Ethan. And I’ve seen many harm others. Am I not virtuous?”
“Brit, of course, you are virtuous! You are always bothered when someone harms another. And I’ve not known you to sit and watch harm come to others for amusement. That would be vulgar and an act of someone not virtuous.” Pausing, he asked, “What does virtuous mean to you?”
Brit said softly, “To be nice? To be honest?”
Ethan nodded pleased with her beginning comprehension. “All of those, baby. Chaste, good, righteous. See what I mean when I say that a virtuous woman would not wish to watch torture and harm for amusement? It would simply not be nice,” he explained not quite believing that he used the word ‘nice’ as a basis for understanding. Brit nodded. Ethan brushed Brit’s hair with his fingertips letting her process more. “Think of what the woman said, Brit. She also told the person that she would ‘kick his ass’.” Ethan shook his head again and continued, “Virtuous women would not speak of anything vulgar, especially not of bodily parts left best not seen in public.” He adjusted his sleeve and commented, “It is unseemly.”
Brit asked, “Unseemly?” Ethan pondered how to explain and traced her lips with his fingertip as he considered how to answer.
“Unseemly is not suitable for the time and place.” He paused to let her think on his words.
“You mean…like when you said not to take my clothes off in public?” Brit spoke slowly and was pleased to see him smile with approval of her connection.
Ethan gave her a loud kiss on the cheek as a reward. “Precisely, Brit. That would be obscene, hence ‘vulgar’.” His finger traced her lips and tapped her nose. “I once heard of a young woman who teasingly greeted her old classmate with ‘hello, you bawdy whore!’ Now, this would clearly not be a comment from a virtuous young lady. Do you see why?” Brit blinked blankly to him, which pleased him no little. With a nod, Ethan gave a satisfied “hmm’ and explained, “A virtuous woman should not know anything about these things. Not bawdy or whores.”
“Ethan,” Brit said, “I’ve heard you use that second word before.” She blinked silently and he saw the wheels turning. “You called Marie Antoinette that word!”
Tapping his fingers on Brit’s side, he coughed politely and said, “Indeed I did. But we are not discussing virtuous men, now are we? No. Virtuous men are trustworthy and honest. Virtuous women are good and clean. They are chaste and honest and gentle. Like you, Brit.”
Ethan raised an eyebrow as he saw her mind continuing to process. She asked, “But…what if I accidently learn those words?” Her voice seemed alarmed.
Ethan chuckled, “You simply do not say them in public and, if you must say them, you would say them alone with your husband. It is simple to stay virtuous, baby.” His arms hugged her reassuringly.
More processing as she rested her head on his shoulder. “And you have stayed virtuous for so very long,” she marveled. Her long lashes blinked rhythmically as she continued to process. “So do you call men ‘virtuous, Ethan?”
Ethan scratched his chin and ran his tongue over his fangs as he thought how to respond. “If they are saints, yes, Brit. For the rest of us, we shall stick to the word ‘worldly’.” He slid her off of his lap and said, “Let us go inside.”
10 comments:
whoever wrote the "medieval home companion", needs to be commented on his efforts and patience, as well as safeguarded from the efforts of the feministic movement... *evil grin*
The Virtuous Man
by Julie Davis and Barbara Firehock,
based on Proverbs 31
10 Who can find a virtuous man?
For his worth is far above chocolate.
11 The heart of his wife safely trusts him;
So he will have no dalliance with bimbos.
12 He does her good and not evil
All the days of his life.
13 He seeks motor oil and socket wrenches,
And willingly works with his hands.
14 He is like the personal shopper,
He brings her food from Harrod's
(or Fortnum's, in a pinch).
15 He also rises while it is yet night,
And makes coffee for her household,
And feedeth the cats.
16 He considers a stock and buys it;
From his profits he invests in a mutual fund.
17 He girds himself with sensitivity,
And learns the art of listening.
18 He perceives that his benefits are good,
And his lamp does not go out by night,
unless his Beloved desires his presence.
19 He stretches out his hands to the stove,
And his hand holds the spatula.
20 He extends his hand to the poor,
Yes, he reaches out his hands to the needy.
[Can't improve on that one!]
21 He is not afraid of snow for his household,
For all his household is stocked with batteries,
a kerosene heater, and kitty litter for icy spots.
22 He takes an interest in the laundry,
and yea, can wield an iron
and the can of spray starch.
And his socks match.
23 His wife is known in the congregation,
when she sits on the Vestry.
24 He remembers birthdays and writeth his own cards,
And helps with the Christmas shopping and wrapping.
25 Sensitivity and openness are his clothing;
he shall rejoice in sessions with the marriage counselor.
26 He opens his mouth with sharing,
And on his tongue is the law of Sharing His Feelings.
27 He watches not over-muchly of sporting events,
And does not eat the potato chips of idleness.
28 His children rise up and call him Daddy,
especially when his wife is down with the flu;
His wife also, and she praises him:
29 "I can't believe you did the dishes all by yourself."
30 Charm is deceitful (just look at Bill Clinton)
and hunkiness is passing,
But a man who fears God, he shall be praised.
31 Give him a beer,
And let his own works praise him in the women's group.
32 He developeth not a pot belly
nor 5 o'clock shadow
nor belcheth at the dinner table.
He notices not his wife's varicose veins or cellulite.
33 He rejoices in his wife's spending sprees
to keep herself lovely for him
and falls at her feet to worship her.
He obliges her not to adorn herself
with cheap polyester.
tilts his head and clarifies "this was obviously written *after* women were allowed to ride bicycles" shakes head slightly "when the evil began..."
"'but a virtuous woman should not know what a ‘bloody’ thing is.”" she arches a delicatly shaped brow at Ethan, leaning back in her chair placing a finger under her chin commenting "its always amusing to see Ethan has these conversations with Britt when no other women are around....I wonder why that is?" and she smiles as her image flickers between demon and angel in the shadows of the dim light.
Unbelievable....
Ethan thinks to himself, that he should not discuss such things in the presence of other women, since many would not pass the test of virtue and pointing it out would not be too polite... that and the fact, that this way there is no interference and the sidewalks of Toxia are spared a few stains of dried blood.
She laughs loudly shaking her head smiling wide at Ethan.."I would presume the dried blood would be yours....." and she smiles again her visage still flickering between demon and angel.
grins slightly* this is exactly the type of comments I try to avoid, so I do not need to prove, once again, whose blood always has been decorating sidewalks, when I had to educate others in the art of slicing through flesh, making a tzimisce fleshbender go green with envy... trues story by the way... quite literally go green, after the acid was done with her *he sits back in his chair and taps his fingertips on the desk in front of the 'gimme shelter' poster* "peace of mind is such a valuable thing to preserve" he adds before fading into shadow
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